WHAT ARE THE ATTRIBUTES OF A MOTHER? (PAGE 17)

Story: Rose Hayford Darko, Tema

As Ghana joins about 65 countries, including the United States of America (USA), to celebrate Mothers’ Day on the second Sunday of May, the question that has been bothering my mind over the past days is, who is a mother and what are the attributes of a mother?. I have pondered over this question for an answer but to no avail.
Some of the people I spoke to said “a mother is a woman who has given birth to children”, others also said “every woman is a mother”, while some maintained that “once a woman has tender love for the needy she is a mother”.
The Holy Book talks about the role of parents and calls on children to honour them so that their days will be long. In another instance the scripture urges “slaves” to be respectful to their mistresses.
There is an Akan saying which translates to mean that “Although one person gives birth, many take care of that child”.
The search for an answer to my question drew me into an argument with some male and female colleagues and although it was really difficult for us to arrive at an answer, we came to the conclusion that all women must be hailed for their tender care and love for the world.
Giving her definition of who is a mother, Mrs Elizabeth Essien, a Church Mother in Tema, said every woman who had sympathy for children is a mother, adding that mothers are caring and loving to children who are not only their biological offsprings, but all those they care for.
She said the word “Mother” is crucial and cannot be used for all women because some have different attributes that do not merit motherhood.
She said some women were naturally selfish and bitter when it came to the welfare of children and therefore could not be referred to as mothers.
A marriage Counsellor at the St Stephen Anglican Church in Tema, Mr Samuel Ayittey Quaye, said there were “three types of mothers, namely, biological mothers, guardians of children, whose duty is to ensure the growth and development of children in their care and care takers.
He said the meaning of the word “Mother” goes beyond a woman who gives birth to include women who exhibit essential qualities of motherhood, such as showing love and providing proper care and support for the growth and development of children under their care.
The Headmistress of the Oninku 2 Junior High School in Tema, Mrs Louisa Quarcoopome, urged children to reciprocate the love shown them by their mothers and obey their parents and all adults.
She said the world would be a peaceful place if children were brought up in an atmosphere of love because the future belonged to them.
She urged both mothers and children to use the day to reflect over the meaning of motherhood and hail mothers for their role in promoting family unity and cohesion.
Some women have devoted their lives to bringing up children who never show any form of appreciation to them and such ungrateful acts have demoralised some women and made it difficult for them to show magnanimity to other’s children.
Some guidelines, including the need for good advice , creating loving home , exercising authority, defining family rules and enforcing them promptly and also teaching by example have been adopted by many ideal women to run their homes . This system has worked for many successful homes where the children have grown into useful adults while husbands have seen the good works of these women .
There are some women who do not have children of their own but are committed to caring for needy children. Are these not mothers? Society must not frown on women who do not have children of their own because one way or the other they assist children of other people to survive
Considering the challenges and solutions in the running of homes, all women with those attributes mentioned are mothers.
Mothers Day is for all Women as Catholic faithful would say “Hail Mother Maria” let society recognise the important role of women in the world as a whole.